On the Risks of Being Kinky and Female in Tech

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Curated by: Small Business Management

While many who live and work in San Francisco are part of the mass tech industry migration, for others, the city holds general lifestyle appeal, and they end up in the industry after the fact. I am one such convert, a lifestyle female dominant who grew up in East Coast kink scene. Before, I had only online interactions that grew out of the dark corners of vanilla dating sites; with few public kink events to offer indication of anyone’s sociability or reputation, there was a tepid air of distrust sewn through every online and offline interaction I had. On moving to San Francisco, I was relieved to live and date in a place where I could find an extensive BDSM community. I could take people on kinky dates, have them meet my kinky friends, and feel some kind of self-esteem in my identity as part of my “real life.”

Photo CC-BY screaming_monkey.

In the time it took me to transition to tech, kink was already experiencing a kind of mainstream cultural resurgence, even in my workplace. I became aware that certain men at Google lived their lives firmly out of the sexual subculture closet, either as polyamorous or kinky; Google

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